Blitzcrank's Fleshling Compatibility Services
by Meatyowllegs
Summary: Follows the lore behind Blitzcrank's dating services. After Garen, Jarvan, and two Demacian summoners get paired up with female champions in the league, they start on the chaotic journey of love. Will Blitzcrank's matches be accurate, or will the couples fall apart. First League fanfiction. Garen x Kat, Jarvan IV x Ahri, OC x Riven, OC x Fiora.


**Hello everyone, **

**This story will not follow Blitzcrank, even though the title may suggest it. It is about the champions that signed up for the beta of the Fleshling Compatibility Services. Please review, it really makes my day. There are five pairings in this story so it might be confusing.**

**Here's the prologue (it's short, chapter 1 is much longer).**

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Garen strolled down the Demacian wing of the Institute of War. Although it housed only champions who were loyal to Demacia, there were two exceptions. It was requested by Jarvan to have two dorms reserved for the two master summoners representing Demacia, Sullivan and Barrett. The league was very hesitant permitting the two summoners to live in the Demacian quarters; the league always promoted healthy interactions between the champions and summoners outside of Summoner's Rift and they feared that Sullivan and Barrett would only be exposed to Demacian champions. However, seeing that Sullivan and Barrett had strong connections to champions from all across Valoran, the league passed the permit.

Jarvan and Garen were extremely close to the two summoners and they would always drink in Gragas' pub every night, but it was different today. Sullivan and Barrett called the prince and the captain of the Vanguards to the Demacian common room.

As Garen walked, he started to reflect on the chat that he had with his mother. His mother urged his to find a woman and get married; she didn't care who the woman was as long as she was a Demacian noble. That really limited Garen's options. As far as he was concerned, he didn't even want to date anyone. His duties were far more important that his feelings. But, as his mother put it, having children was one of his duties. Garen's mind soon drifted to the conversation with Jarvan; Jarvan had named all the female Demacian nobles. None of them suited Garen's tastes; they were all too feminine. Fiora, on the other hand, was just not appealing to Garen. Sure, she was attractive and quite independent, but Garen knew that they would not make a good couple.

"Garen, wait up!" cried Jarvan as he trudged closer to Garen. "This meeting better be good, I was looking forward to some drinking tonight. I lost all my matches today."

"Are you sure you're fine, Jarvan? You know, after that incident?" asked Garen. Shyvana had recently broken up with Jarvan, stating that his presence distracts her from her duties as a Vanguard.

"Garen, let's not bring that up. I don't like dwelling on it."

* * *

"Garen, let's get this straight. You're 28, and you've never been with a single woman. You don't even talk to girls except your mom and Lux," said Sullivan. "This would be the perfect opportunity. What could it hurt. It's just going to take a while to answer 748 questions. Plus, you don't even have to waste time going on first dates with women who have nothing in common with you. Your mom would be happy as well."

"And Jarvan," continued Barret, "You seriously need to get over Shyvana; even Garen saw that she wasn't meant for you. This program will give you a new fresh start."

"Fine, we'll do it," answered Jarvan and Garen simultaneously.

* * *

_2 days later_

Garen woke up and stretched. He had to admit, he was pretty excited today. The results from Blitzcrank's test would be delivered and just as he stood up, he noticed a large paper scroll underneath his door. It was another copy of Blitzcrank's questionnaire, written with an elegant but strict handwriting. On top, there was a signature. _Katarina Du Couteau. _As Garen read through the answers that Kat gave, a piece of paper fell down. He bent over and picked it up.

_Dear Garen, the Might of Demacia, _

_Your answers had a 99.86% compatibility rate with Katarina's answers. As the pair with the highest compatibility rate, I will be publishing these results in the next Journal of Justice issue. Thank you for choosing the Fleshling Compatibility Services._

_Blitzcrank_

Garen burst out of his door and ran straight into Jarvan's room next door. "Jarvan, I just got my results. Look who it is. This is outrageous; I will never date that Noxian."

"Ah, I knew it was going to be her! The way you two fought in sync with each other in Kalamanda proved it. Seriously Garen, you can't control who your heart desires and I know you like her. Just admit it Garen, even Shyvana could see it, you don't admire Katarina just for her skills; you're obviously like her. We all know that what developed in Kalamanda was more than a rivalry," Jarvan chuckled, everyone in the League knew that Garen and Katarina were attracted to each other. Since both of them were inexperienced in relationships and their sense of duty to their city states were very strong, they always seemed like they wanted to kill each other.

"Jarvan, my loyalty belongs to Demacia and not a Noxian scum. I would rather have a wife that I don't love than someone I like from Noxus." Garen shook his head.

"Are you admitting you like Katarina?

"It would ruin the Crownguard reputation, and what would my mother think. I would be disowned!"

Jarvan walked over to his friend and patted his shoulder. "I'm sure it would work out. My dad is asking me to find a wife as well. He wants to step down from the throne. But Blitzcrank said that you and Kat had the highest compatibility rate; give it a try. Maybe she abandon Noxus. I heard that she's not particularly fond of Swain.

"Don't pity me, Jarvan. Her values are so different; while our nobles wear dresses and dance in balls, she's probably trying to kill someone." Garen sighed. "Let's see who you got, Jarvan. The future Queen of Demacia, I wonder who she is. Demacia would need someone more appropriate."

"My mother wasn't really the ideal queen. It's fine, Garen, I know that she was very unattractive; my father just got reckless while drunk one night," sighed Jarvan as he broke the seal on the scroll.

"Ahri... Well, Jarvan, she's definitely very attractive; I would dare say that she's one of the most attractive League champions," smiled Garen, happy for his friend. He took Jarvan's scroll from his hands. On the other hand, Jarvan looked a bit concerned.

As Garen read through Ahri's answers, he started to understand how Blitzcrank paired couples. Jarvan, he knew for a fact, wasn't like his father at all. Jarvan III ruled Demacia through paperwork and never left the castle; however, Jarvan IV always had faith in the citizens of Demacia and couldn't settle down in a single place for too long. Other than the Institute, Ahri never really had a home and according to her response she "wanted to settle down but [she] would never stay in a single place for a prolonged period". Maybe, Blitzcrank's system did have logical mechanics behind it... Maybe, his compatibility rate with Katarina wasn't a miscalculation. Garen shook his head, he couldn't have these treacherous thoughts swirling in his head.

"Jarvan, you should read her responses, she really seems to suit you," Garen handed back the scroll to Jarvan.

Just as Jarvan began to say something, Sullivan and Barrett crashed through the door. "Look... who we... got," panted Barrett.

"Fiora and Riven..." Garen stared. "That's a surprise. I never thought Fiora or Riven would be dating anyone."

"Anyways, let's go find Gragas. We owe you two a drink from the night before," said Sullivan as he held the door open.

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**OOC? R&R, please. It's really fun to read reviews. Ideas for next chapt?**

**Flames will be used to make cookies for good reviews! (::) (::) (::) **


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